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Last updated on 8 June 2008

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Tuesday, July 20th, 2004

I have a confession…a deep, dark, scary, scandalous confession. I’m having trouble getting a tank of Sea Monkeys started! (Insert dramatic chord here.) I know! What’s up with that? I am doing some presentations at the end of August, so it is vitally important for me to have a few tanks going, but will they work? No, they won’t. I’ve tried twice now — both times in a giant club soda bottle, which is nice and clean and bacteria free! But nothing. Just salty water with bits in it. So I’m trying a third time with six separate tanks (four Ghostly Galleons, one Magicquarium, and one Executive Tank), thinking maybe it’s the bottle.

But it’s a poor carpenter who blames her tools…

It’s warm outside, maybe that’s it? Or the water — I’ve tried it with purified water twice. Maybe it’s too pure? Or the packages — some of them are five years old. But all of these things are just a way of justifying my failure. Sea Monkeys can live up to 50 years in the packages, so that can’t be it. The water’s too pure? Yeah, that’s going to be a real problem, Sue. And the warmth? Okay, that is a possiblity, but last year I had no problems… So I finally accepted that it’s me, I’m the problem. And that’s hard for me to say. ‘Cause I’m perfect after all.

This may seem like a little thing to you, gentle reader, but I’m the Sea Monkey Lady. I write books, write web sites, do interviews! I am the Sea Monkey expert…and I can’t even get one tiny 300 ml tank going. This goes to the very heart of who I am — I know about Sea Monkeys, therefore I am!

I have to admit that a little one on one counselling is not going to help me here. I need a support system, a full group to help me deal with these issues. To help me come to terms with the fact that (a) I am not always right and (b) I may have to retire my title to someone more worthy. But I’ll deal with it. I’m a strong woman with principles and morals and I will find another role in life. I could be the Magic 8 Ball Lady, or an expert on lawnmowers…Nah, it doesn’t feel right.

I need a beverage. A nice hot cup of Earl Grey with vanilla tea. (If you’ve ever seen anything on UK television, you will know that a hot cup of tea cures all ills. Someone dies, make a cup of tea? A murder? Perhaps a full pot!)

Life! I have life!!! In four of the six tanks we have life! I do know what I’m doing (I can ignore the other two tanks as they may still come to life!) Woo and hoo! Celebrate good times, come on!

Okay I’m feeling better now…it must have been the soda bottle. That nasty, evil thing, making me doubt myself! YAY!!!!

I best drink that cup of tea now…it’s getting cold.

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