Sea Monkeys love the holiday season…listening to strange versions of “A Night Before Christmas”, spinning the dreidl, and dreaming of sugar plum fairies dancing in their ganglian clusters. In short, don’t leave your Sea Monkeys out of the holidays. Here are a few hints to help your Sea Monkeys both survive and enjoy the holiday season.


1. Don’t give the Sea-Monkeys circus items like flaming hoops in the hope that they will perform – they refuse to be degraded in that fashion.
2. A Lincoln town car.
3. Don’t put a pea in their tank and yell “Hey it’s a beach ball” as they will die and this may wreck your holiday season. (This is a true story).
4. Sea-Monkeys like to be included in the Christmas festivities. To make them feel included give them a stocking, let them open presents with the family, watch the tv specials, and overall, let them sit at the dinner table with you.
5. Your Sea-Monkey bubble necklace makes a great transporter for your Sea-Monkeys. So, try to take them carolling with you but make sure that you wrap them up in a scarf!
6. Don’t eat or blow up your Sea-Monkeys. I know that there is an obsession with maiming Sea-Monkeys but try to avoid doing this during the holiday season.
7. Even though Sea-Monkeys are generally communist, they still like to receive gifts. Try to give them such presents as Mao Tse Tung’s Little Red Book or a nice beard like Lenin’s.
8. Share your nog…need I say more.

Sea-Monkeys love the Yuletide season but what they love best are bad Christmas carols.

(Sung to “Frosty the Snowman”)

Perky the Sea-Monkey
Was a happy briny crustacean
He came from a packet
of Instant Life
And caused such a sensation

Oh Perky the Sea-Monkey
He was quite a sight
When he came to life
All the people cried
And we drank rum all night

There must have been some magic in that Magic Plasma II
For when we poured it in the tank
He began to sneeze “achoo”

Perky the Sea-Monkey
Was a lovely happy pet
How he came to be
Is a mystery
But, I’ll figure it out yet.


All I want for Christmas is to breathe through my feet
Breathe through my feet, breathe through my feet
All I want for Christmas is to breathe through my feet
So I can see another Christmas


You know Percy, and Perky, and Smeghead, and Poony
Spammy, and Pinky, and Bummy, and Loony
But do you recall
The most famous Sea-Monkey® of all?

Sputnik the red-toed Sea-Monk
Had revolutionary notions
He wanted to control the means of
Sea-Monkey® production.

All of the other Sea-Monkeys®
Mocked him and were quite rude
They never let poor Sputnik
Eat the special Grow-Quick food.

Then late one Saturday night
Sputnik planned a coup
They overthrew the bourgeois owner
And stole all of the food

All of the Sea-Monkeys® loved him
And appointed him Chair-Man
Sputnik the red toed Sea-Monk
What a glorious 5 year plan.

Share your holiday fun and holiday pictures with the Sea Monkey Lady